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How to jump bank queues without being noticed

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Bank queues are just a nightmare. Everyone wants to jump it but few know how to do so without looking like jerks. When banks introduced ATM machines, they thought that would empty the ever full banking halls. But you see, an ATM is just limited to withdrawing (and in some banks depositing) cash, yet banking is very broad. You see, some want to open accounts, apply for loans, obtain a stamped statement or solve other related issues.

It is a pity that even after banks introduced mobile banking, internet banking and mtaani agents, some people will always send us back to the bank to settle utility bills. My landlord, for instance, only accepts a slip from the bank – no EFT, M-Pesa, cheques or Mtaani deposits are allowed. So in one way or another, you will always find yourself in the bank queue.

So after banks discovered that the technology did not clear the long lines in their banking halls, they introduced the ticketing system to bring some sanity in the bank queues. Then some institutions went a step further to install seats in the banking hall to ensure that you don’t faint while waiting to be served – some banks even offer you tea as you wait!

One of the best ways to beat bank queues is by not waiting. Most banks are usually inside shopping malls, and you are likely to be at the bank when you need to shop. Get your ticket, check the waiting time then concentrate on the other business. If no waiting time is displayed, check how far your ticket number is then estimate how long it will take to get back to you. By the time you come, they will have called your number and so just go straight to the teller.

The other way to beat bank queues is by taking the place of those who left for other businesses. Have you been to a banking hall, then a number is called two times and then they skip to the next because nobody is moving forward? Volunteer yourself to be served. In a split second, anybody who wants to be served will jump up even before the machine completes calling their number. If at the end of one second nobody is moving forward, move. The tellers don’t even ask your number. But you need to be careful, because some institutions designate different tellers for different tasks. So you need to familiarise yourself with the system before volunteering to be served.

Finally, it is important to always get to the bank ready to be served. Have you seen how Indians enter the bank with a slip already filled? They don’t manufacture those slips in their homes. Neither do banks dish them out like check books. Carry one slip and ensure that you don’t store up for yourself a bunch of slips you don’t need. Just carry one for next time, and fill it before visiting the bank. That way, jumping the queue will be easy for you. Who knows? You might just find yourself the only person on the queue and hence move faster.

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